The Obscure Destroyer

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Wv_Hawk_vW
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The Obscure Destroyer

Postby Wv_Hawk_vW » Thu Jun 28, 2012 6:53 am

Kennedy: alright, so let's recap on the events of the past.... what, 10? 20 years?
Secretary of Chronicle: we have had the stock market crash 6 times in half as many years, which is why we banned stock market use, and then we went to war with the Ramses Empire, which was quickly and decisively settled by merchants from both sides selling useless weapons to both sides-- in other words, mutual sabotage ended the war.
Secretary of Defense: I still don't know how they managed to do that!
Secretary of Chronicle: as was observed by Laurifer, the ramsians are similar to the rivi'i, and even have similar DNA, however their cultures are, obviously, different, as the rivi'i wouldn't allow their merchants to sell weapons.
Laurifer: ahem!
Secretary of Chronicle: moving right along here, the next four years after that have been spent in a relative peace. we are essentially trying to wedge ourselves into a very small crack, and the others don't like us, however the fact that they aren't attacking us relentlessly means they understand that we absolutely have to do this.
Laurifer: alright, basically, we formed a small empire within a highly crouded territory, and while nobody likes it, nobody is doing anything about it. in 4 years, while our empire has not been very successful, the fact that we are negotiating for each and every inch of turf and throwing our entire military at whatever we can't negotiate for, means that we are doing at least relatively well.
Secretary of chronicle: i was getting there...
Laurifer: you werent going fast enough, at the rate you were going it was going to be tomorrow before we could get onto what we needed to do. long story short--
Secretary of chronicle: i can easily relieve you of your post...
Kennedy: do that, and your fired. go on.
Laurifer: --the other racial formations are talking about making some pretty hasty alliances, mostly military in nature, and they are gathering all their fleet... *laurifer's third eye starts projecting a holographic map* right here, almost 60 parsecs in the 90,40,30 generic star direction. according to my sensor network, there is a very strong gravitational pull right here *laurifer points at a spot in the far-away point of the cone's direction* meaning that either the ta'yawhans have a fleet of super-star-ships there or an unknown alien race has assembled a very large fleet right there. this leaves us two possibilities: one, the aliens are friendly, extremely unlikely considering the likelyhood of any cargo, even weapons-for-sale, being heavy enough to be the equivalent of nearly 4 middle-sized proto-stars, or two, they are enemies. that would make better sense, as there are some military-grade materials that are incredibly strong and easy to obtain, and therefore are cheap, but they are extremely heavy. these materials are used as armor. there are other experimental materials, also of very high weight, that allow for various types of reactors to generate an incredibly large amount of energy, but this is getting too technical with the techno-babble. continuing on, the weight combined with the very large military force pointed in that general direction mean that there is a 94% chance that they are not only hostile, but very deadly, considering that one of the ramsian battleships is almost more than a match for 3 phoenix-class superbattleships, and there are at least 60 ramsian battleships.
Kennedy: thank you for that summarization, laurifer, and now to save time, i shall have a vote: if you wish for us to take military action, raise your hand in a pistol shape. if you wish for us to take non-military action, the vulcan symbol. if you wish for us to ignore this, give me the finger.
*out of 65 people in the room, 60 of them say they want military action*
Kennedy: that settles it then.
Secretary of defense: one more thing--
Laurifer: telepathy. he wants to ask about fleet captain penney, who is currently indisposed, splurging his massive and nearly infinite fortune on his retirement.
Kennedy: bring him back. his skills are far too--
Laurifer: consider it done. *laurifer stands up and teleports away*
Kennedy: i want plans to defend against this new threat by tomorrow afternoon.

*laurifer goes to a computer and types in a few keys*
Computer: Delfroyale, Penney. Rank: Fleet-captain. Physical Age: 163 years 6 months 92 days, insufficient data for further precision.
Laurifer: status of Penney.
Computer: location is unknown.
*laurifer shakes his head slowly*
Computer: current career: retired military.
Laurifer: does captain penney have any relatives, any loved ones?
Computer: starting with closest living family, then friends: Vegas Delfroyale, George Treet...
Laurifer: thank you. have a good day.
Computer: may your day be as well as any other's day has been.

Laurifer: Kadop, how is father?
Kadop: father is unwell. his simplification programs are breaking down, and once that happens, his sanity will loosen its hold on him, and eventually, all that will be left of him is a child rocking back and forth.
Laurifer: how much time does he have?
Kadop: he will not be alive tomorrow.
Laurifer: then we must begin immediately.
*laurifer goes to greywing, who activates upon noticing his son*
Laurifer: father, it is me, laurifer.
Greywing: Laurifer. Lifelike Artificial Unit Responsible for Infiltration, and Functional Electronic Replicant.
Laurifer: good, you remembered.
Greywing: i create only the best. you and kadop are my greatest creations.
Laurifer: father, you have only--
Greywing: my programming is falling apart because of a virus created by the ramsians. i recognize the signature that their virus leaves behind. after it gets done, not even basic binary code remains. i only have 4 hours to remain. transfer only the information i have staked out, for it is what is left of the data that has yet to be destroyed.
Kadop: it is ready.
Laurifer: lets get this party on the road.
*laurifer pulls a cord from the back of his head and inserts it into a computer, then kadop pulls one from the computer and inserts it into greywing's side. both cyborgs' eyes start glowing, then they roll back into the heads.*
Laurifer: so, penney's wife is not a hundred percent human.
Kadop: fascinating, and he managed to get her pregnant.
Laurifer: thank you, father. now i have a general idea of where to look for vegas at.
Greywing: good thing that damn virus didn't get to my translocation program yet! if anyone will know where penney is, it will be vegas.
Kadop: my ship, the humidifier, can unlock the higher dimensions.
Laurifer: no time to waste. lets book it!

Vegas: you guys certainly seem to be on a mission.
Laurifer: should i go straight for the purpose or relax you into it?
Kadop: please, i should be the diplomat here, not you.
Vegas: alright kadop, what would you like to say?
Kadop: should i go straight for the purpose or relax you into it?
*laurifer punches kadop's left arm*
Vegas: to you, laurifer, you can go straight for the jugulars. to you, kadop, please relax me into it.
*the cyborgs give each other confused looks*
Vegas: so, how is the terran empire doing while i am not pressing my thumb on it?
Laurifer: very in--
Kadop: --it is currently doing a lot better than expected.
Laurifer: very inefficient at anything. i was able to summarize in just under 20 minutes what was projected to take 2 days to explain, and i had a similar effect with my audience as was expected with the other method.
Vegas: it's all in the patience, my friend.
Laurifer: just one problem with that.
Kadop: not yet!
Laurifer: there is a massive enemy fleet that is about 6 days--
Vegas: uhh, gravimetric distortions?
Laurifer: well, yeah..
Vegas: inability to use telescopes to examine enemy fleet?
Laurifer: that is correct...
Vegas: they are the rompvershlings. while they have some pretty large ships, their clever engineers found a way to use an FTL drive for maneuvering. specifically, they tend to use warp drive to outmaneuver even average fighters. their primary FTL drive is tachyon conversion drive, and then there's teleportation when time is of the essense, or to save said time on long-distance journeys, though that takes the fun out of getting there, which is half the fun of any trip.
Laurifer: please, time is of the essense.
Vegas: their technological level is extremely high, and their ships are very powerful. however, their technology seems to consist mostly of things with odd-ball advantages. for example, the hyperbolic tachyon generator power-core almost as much energy as an artificial supernova power plant, is lightweight, and can double as a back-up tachyon-converter for tachyon conversion drive as well as a magnetic shield generator, however those last two properties are rarely, if ever used. while their hull is weak, it is extremely light; it is minimized in weight, because it serves only to hold in the atmosphere and to house the internal circuitry and etc. only a race of their technological level could minimize it that much. their shields are highly constricted, and basically wrap themselves around the skin of the ship. in addition, there are three layers: the first one is the typically shaped sphere. the second shield set is closely constricted to the hull's shape; in fact, in terms of shape, it is essentially a bloated version of the ship. the third layer isn't technically a shield-set, but instead is used to help maintain structural integrity, for example, when their ship is entering the atmosphere.
Kadop: we came here for one specific thing, not this...
Vegas: calm your tits, I'm giving you the information you need to single-handedly, without external support, win a minor war against the rompvershlings. moving right along, their primary weapons consist largely of missiles and energy-beams and rays. secondary weapons could be anything from simple flak to grappling hooks to boarding pods, to simply ramming you and hoping for the best.
Laurifer: while this is very fascinating...
Vegas: ...you want to know that the location of captain penney is in the aquarius star system, which is closest to the star system kennedy decided to inhabit. that is the star system he would have encountered next had he gone further, and penney is being a hermit there. which planet he is on, i do not know; however, there is an earthlike planet, mostly with almost resort-like places that can allow one to relax easily. it is filled with rainforests, the beaches are beautiful, i can see why he chose that spot.
Kadop: thank you, vegas.
Vegas: oh, and here's a data padd holding all of what i have told you, in case you chumps forgot to record it yourself.
Laurifer: thank you very much.

Laurifer: we are at the planet that vegas mentioned.
Kadop: my sensor cluster is not showing anything about his location.
Laurifer: that's because the planet's generating a natural anti-gravimetric field, as well as a gravity field that's twice as strong as a normal one. your sensors couldn't even see the broad side of a barn if you stamped a target on it's fat ass, plastered it with signal flares, and painted it with lasers.
Kadop: alright then, how are we--
Laurifer: there. right there, don't you see it?
Kadop: what are you talking about?
Laurifer: zoom in closer, my sister. see that tent?
Kadop: huh, hadn't noticed.
Laurifer: that is penney's camp, and sinse he is physically about 80 years old, he wouldn't spend much time far from camp.
Computer: lifesign located. Penney Delfroyale. Status: asleep.
Kadop: found where he's lounging at currently.
Laurifer: preparing a landing pod, for most effective message sending.
Kadop: here, use this to help convince him. he will mistake you for father, whom he knows better than either of us.

Penney: where's my doll?
*penney grabs his grabbing-cane and starts turning over stones, trying to find his doll. moments later, he finds a centaur that bears a remarkable resemblance to vegas.*
Penney: ah, there you are, there's vegan! now all i have to do-- ooh, ahh. *penney lies down on a towell* is sit back and relax. *penney sets vegan to his side, puts his hands behind his head, and closes his eyes.*
Vegan: beep. beep. beep.
Penney: huh? *penney picks up the doll and unzips the back of it; the tracking beacon is glowing yellow, meaning that the target is military and known* THAT isn't good! *penney rolls over, and then is slightly shaken when laurifer and kadop's pod hits the sand. penney sits up and looks at the pod, just as laurifer pops his head out.* Greywing!

Laurifer: Penney, good to see you.
Penney: so how are things in the empire doing?
Laurifer: they are being managed very well. kennedy has been getting run ragged, lately, but that's because he recently fired absolutely all the secretaries and has been running the empire single-handedly, up until 4 months ago.
Penney: that is something that he is good at, that is for sure!
Laurifer: he has ordered me to get you and fetch you back.
Penney: wait wait wait... what did he do to force you into this?
Laurifer: uh, he didn't?
Penney: uncertainty. where did you learn THAT tone of voice? last time we talked, you had 6, and that was not one of them.
Laurifer: I have had upgrades sinse then--
Penney: then why don't i see any? oh, what's this? *penney's hand passes over the battery pack of the mirage device, and laurifer's true colors are shown*
Kadop: it would appear that our true side has been revealed.
Penney: you bastard.
Laurifer: captain penney, based upon article 4, section 21, sub-section 6, paragraph 3, sentence 7, you are ordered to--
Penney: NO!!!! I am an old man, you are not going to recruit me back to the military that easy! I am tired as hell of your attempts to bring me back, but I am not returning to the military!
Laurifer: I was afraid you were going to--
Penney: I have put more time into the military than any of you, and i am not going to take this any more!!!
*laurifer pulls out a phaser; penney performs a backflip while kicking laurifer's phaser out of his hands. then when he lands, he leaps into the air and does a kick to laurifer's jaw, knocking him on his back, and landing on his own feet*
Laurifer: i am surprised, old man.
Penney: I have had enough of you!!! *penney pulls an energized sword out of his cane, and swings it at laurifer; just then, kadop fires an energy bolt that if the sword were held by anyone else, would have knocked it out of penney's hands*
Kadop: leave my brother alone!
Penney: I will deal with you later! *penney swings at kadop, pressing the trigger, making the sword fire an energy bolt of it's own at kadop*
Laurifer: leave kadop alone!!! *laurifer leaps after penney and tackles him*
Penney: i will not return to the military!!! *penney stabs laurifer with the sword and fires a massive energy ray, frying several internal components*
Kadop: NOOO!!!!! *kadop throws his tomahawk at penney, who barely dodges the tomahawk by ducking*
Penney: all this tech and you still have basic tomahawks?! *penney charges after kadop, shooting energy bolts as he runs*
Kadop: please don't prove to be a berserker! *kadop attempts to throw penney behind him; penney, using kadop's throw as momentum, grabs kadop and leaps forward, taking kadop with him, and diving into the water*
Laurifer: no, brother! *Laurifer attempts to move his legs* paralyzed! *laurifer pulls out a phase rifle and aims at penney, who is slowly riping kadop apart; laurifer fires a taze-burst at penney, which stops him long enough for kadop to throw him out*
Penney: you are relentless! *penney throws a hammer at Kadop and runs off to the nearby shack*
Laurifer: wow. i did not notice that.
Kadop: not to worry, I'll handle him!
Laurifer: wait, WAIT! don't leave me here, paralyzed like--
Kadop: 5 minutes, no more. *kadop runs off*

Kadop: come out, come out, whereever you are... *kadop sees penney's heat-signature* ah-hah! found you! *kadop grabs a nearby crow-bar and a long wrench, then charges into penney's officeroom*
Penney: what-- FUCK! *penney turns around to see the door flying at him at high speed; he fires both weapons on maximum setting. the laser vaporizes the door while the phased plasma cannon gives kadop quite a shock*
Kadop: that's going to hurt when my sensors reactivate! *kadop kicks penney back, then with two swift moves empties his hands of weapons. then he hits him across the face with the crowbar while penney tries to pull out a pistol. kadop goes berserk, pounding on the hand holding the pistol until the pistol is sent flying across the room. then kadop picks penney up and attempts to hit him again, when penney decks kadop and leaps out of the window.*
Laurifer: stop him!
Kadop: on it!!! *kadop jumps out the window just as penney is climbing on shore; he sees that laurifer still has a rifle in his hands*
Penney: do you guys never give up?! *penney throws laurifer's rifle into the air and stabs his shoulder, immobilizing his arms; kadop attempts a roundhouse kick that is dodged as penney leaps up into the air. when he comes down, before he can react, laurifer, who's systems have been repaired sufficiently, simply gives penney a nice kick into the groin, leaving him paralyzed if not writhing in pain*
Kadop: very nicely done, if i do say so mys... *the phaser rifle lands on penney's head*
Laurifer: you knocked it over. pick it up.

Kennedy: greetings, penney.
Penney: im done with you.
Kennedy: actually, i was going to take you to see the latest movie. it's called "Terran Imperial Battleship USS Phoenix". basically, it glorifies all your achievements during your career.
Penney: really? sounds interesting.
Kadop: i got tickets to the theater.
Laurifer: mister president, good to see you finally taking time to relax.
Penney: that was at my insistence, actually.
Kennedy: i wouldn't be doing this if penney gave me a choice.

Penney: alright, the movie's starting!
Kennedy: penney, popcorn?
Penney: sure. *penney grabs a bag*
Laurifer: you know what, i want some too.
Kadop: but that will mess up your system!
Laurifer: theres a point behind having an organic material digestive system, and im going to use it for that. *larufer starts to chomp down*
Movie: please cease use of all communication devices.
Man: blahblahblahblah, yabber blabber blabber yabber balhblahblah, oh yeah, hehe, blahblahblah...
Movie: cease the use, immediately.
Man: oh hehe, yah, she blahblahblah and then she yabber yabber yabber...
Movie: Stop using your cell phones. NOW.
Man: and then she said "mom, what are you doing?!" and lisa said "umm, nothing that you--"
Movie: Cataclysm Cat is NOT amused.
*everyone stops talking*
Soundtrack wrote:MPA's Anything to Say

Penney: cataclysm cat...? oh shit, we have to get everyone--
*suddenly, a very big red cat starts hovering over the screen*
Penney: where's my pistole?!?!
Kennedy: what is it?
*the cat starts spinning around, spewing toxic gas around the room. as the people in the front rows start to choke, everyone starts screaming and panicking, running to the exits-- only to find that they have been blocked*
Laurifer: oh, fuck! and i forgot to charge my blaster!
Kadop: I'll handle him! *kadop stands and is about to throw his tomahawk, when penney stops him*
Penney: no, i know precisely where and how to hit him, it will take to long to describe, give it to me. *penney grabs the tomahawk* Hey, pussy cat, Get the FUCK down from there!!! *as the cat stops long enough to notice penney, penney throws the tomahawk; it hits him on the soft spot on his belly, knocking him down in a very perturbed meow*
Kennedy: penney, do you realize you have just saved just under a hundred people?
Penney: no, i didnt just save a hundred people, i killed a very noisy and very ruckus-causing beast of terror.
Discord: WvHawkvW#6491.

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Re: The Obscure Destroyer

Postby Wv_Hawk_vW » Sat Jun 30, 2012 5:08 pm

Penney: first, a comment on your security.
Kennedy: i refuse to have any security.
Penney: then I am done. *penney stands up and starts to leave*
Kennedy: wait!
Penney: without security, there is no way to defend yourself from assassination. that nearly happened to you when the cat attempted to kill everyone in the room, you included.
Kennedy: fine, i will reinstate the secret service.
Penney: thank you. *penney sits down* second, a comment on your military discipline.
Kennedy: discipline is at an all-time high.
Penney: it has never been this low. take a look at this man, he can't even perform a simple push-up! now drop and gimme 20! *the soldier he gives the order to falls flat on his face*
Kennedy: we don't use push-ups to discipline our troops.
Penney: then what do you use? candy?!
Kennedy: actually, we use various devices.
Penney: such as?
Kennedy: i would prefer not to say.
Penney: then they do not work. in fact--
Laurifer: mister president there are enemy protesters outside the front.
Kadop: they are heavily armed.
Kennedy: they are always heavily armed, kad-- *an explosion shakes the room* not THAT heavily armed! that was a G-P-B!
*a bunch of secret service agents run into the room*
Agent1: mister president
Agent2: we must leave
Agent3: NOW!!!
*the 3 agents pick up kennedy in his chair before he can react, and they start taking him to the nearby bunker, with laurifer, penney, and kadop in hot persuit*
Protestor: you there! *the protester shoots the agents before they can react; kennedy is dropped and falls out of his chair*
Penney: hey protester! *penney grabs the protester's pistol out of his hand and decks him* shoot the president next time.
Kadop: don't give him any-- *penney smashes the protester's head into the ground* shit, your going to kill all of them.
Penney: just the ones i give ideas to. Kennedy, at this point, i think a ship, any ship that isn't stuck on the ground, would be safer than this.
*penney leads the group to the living area, where they are stopped by a rather large mob of terrorists. the living area has two starcases, has multiple nude statues of various deities, and is filled with hundreds of weapons of very, very many types, ranging from hand-cannons and high-wattage plasma rifles to nunchucks and sais*
Lafayette: nowhere for you to go now, mister president!
Penney: same with you.
Lafayette: you have just a few crappy weapons, we have GUNS and we have ARTILLERY!
Penney, no, what you have are cheap weapons of such low quality that they can't even be called crappy, and those guns of yours still use crappy steel, and they still launch mere lead projectiles.
Lafayette: then you will pay for your insolence!
*laurifer steps forward and pushes a button on his wrist*
Lafayette: kill them.
*each and every member of the mob sprays at penney, laurifer, kadop, and kennedy; after unloading their clips, laurifer's magnetic shield disengages, and the bullets fall to the ground*
Lafayette: you may have survived a barrage of mere bullets, but not this.
Kennedy: the shit's about to hit the fan! *kennedy runs off*
Penney: you two go after kennedy. I'll handle these guys.
*kadop and laurifer give each other looks of assurement and run after kennedy*
Lafayette: handle us?! you'll handle us?! I have dealt with your predecessors before, you are no different.
Penney: you mistake me for a secret service agent. well. *penney outstretches his hand in a "come-at-me" posture* I am not with the police, i am not from the FBI, i am not with the CIA, I am not with the IRS, i am not even your dad's professional sandwich maker.
Lafayette: hmph, you should respect your ancestors more. kill him.
*all the terrorists draw multiple various weapons and charge after penney, who simply throws each of them at a different statue*
Penney: come on! is all that you got!?
*all the terrorists grab a ranged weapon and start throwing or shooting it at penney, who leaps to the nearest one, graps his rifle, and vaporizes about 8 terrorists. then the other 9 terrorists leap across the gap between staircases and start attacking penney. penney realizes the battery pack is empty and throws the rifle at some of the terrorists, grabs a flail, and starts bashing heads. after killing 5 of the 9 terrorists, the flail gets stuck in one of the heads; penney then simply pulls out his sword and blasts the terrorists with energy bolts.*
Lafayette: dammit, woman, you will be the death of me!! Mark my words, captain, mark them well.
Penney: how did you--
Lafayette: I have survived your predecessors and their ancestors and their predecessors, and i will survive you! Voltar Prime will be mine!!!
Penney: *penney pulls out a shotgun* how about i just blow you to pieces right here and now?
Lafayette: hahaha!!! *lafayette grabs the shotgun, expands his mouth to a massive size, and devours the shotgun*
Kennedy: run!!! RUN!!!
*kennedy and the brothers suddenly come running into the living area, they slam the door and lock it, and it starts getting pounded on*
Lafayette: well, look who's back!
*lafayette eats laurifer, kadop, and kennedy's weapons the same way he ate penney's shotgun*
Penney: what the hell???
Lafayette: you are not going to be able to defend yourself, you have lost! miserab-- *penney punches lafayette in the chest, and lafayette explodes*
Penney: how did that--
Laurifer: no time to investigate.
Kadop: the humidifier is ready.
Laurifer: i thought we were going to be using the nebulizer?
Kennedy: does it even matter?!?!
Penney: which one's stronger?
Laurifer: the nebulizer.
Penney: kennedy, take the humidifier. I will fly the nebulizer.
*the four are teleported to their respective ships*
Penney:now we have to wait for the terrorists to leave. in the meantime, i am feeling experimental. anyone care for a cheap movie?
Kennedy: why does it have to be cheap?
Penney: any movie will do, really, it just has to be in a typical movie theater.

Kennedy: i can absolutely NOT believe you are watching nude nuns with big guns.
Penney: they were selling at 5 bucks a ticket. all the other movies were at minimum 30.
Kadop: besides, they have cheap and tasty popcorn. *kadop chomps down on more popcorn*
Laurifer: kadop, why must you eat popc-- *kadop puts popcorn in laurifer's mouth* hmm, not bad. *laurifer grabs a handfull and starts eating some*
Penney: alright. everyone except laurifer sits in the back. laurifer, front please.
Laurifer: why?
Penney: just do it.
*everyone takes their respective positions, and penney pulls out his mobile phone*
Kennedy: what are you doing?
Penney: continuing the experiment.
Kadop: don't be an ass, penney.
Penney: if I'm right, then I wont be the one who's being an ass, and if im wrong, i dont like this movie anyway so i will leave, and you three can join in.
Kennedy: ugh, its starting.
Laurifer: why are you calling? and why am i over here?
Penney: just keep using the phone.
Movie: please cease use of all communication devices.
Penney: alright, keep using the phone, don't hang up just yet.
Laurifer: but it said--
Penney: i want to see if the same thing happens this time as happened last time.
Movie: cease the use, immediately.
Penney: keep using the phone.
Movie: Cataclysm cat is NOT amused.
*another cat flies up and levitates in front of the screen, but this time he's blue and has a green hue around him*
Penney: alright kadop, this is why i didnt send you. hand me the tomahawk.
*cataclysm cat starts spewing the toxic gas, and penney hands a gas mask to kennedy*
Penney: hey cataclysmacataclysma! HAAAACKS!!!!! *penney throws the tomahawk, but this time it bounces off the shield* SHIT! *penney puts on another gas mask*
Laurifer: hey pussy cat, Get the FUCK down from there! *laurifer fires his blaster several times, each time bouncing off of the cat's deflector shield*
Kadop: crap!!!! *kadop and penney start trying to evacuate everyone*
Kennedy: THIS is NOT good!
*suddenly, a man who looks a lot like treet leaps into the air and buries an ax in the cat.*
Penney: is it me or did that guy look a lot like treat?
Kadop: commander treet holds a resemblance to that man.
Penney: Laurifer!
Laurifer: already intercepting him.... damn! he got out the door before i could follow and when i got out the door he was gone.
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Re: The Obscure Destroyer

Postby Wv_Hawk_vW » Sun Jul 01, 2012 7:08 pm

Penney: i think i know who that is, kennedy.
Kennedy: you think that's engineer treet?
Penney: it would explain quite a lot. he is, after all, the only person i know who can analyze something all at once. Laurifer, scan the area for a sillicon-based mind-enhancement implant and a detachable bionic eye.
Laurifer: searching. there's several thousand people in this area, it will take some time.
Penney: kadop, stay with kennedy. *penney heads out of the theater*
Laurifer: found him.
Penney: lets go.
*penney and laurifer start walking in the direction of laurifer's scans, when suddenly laurifer pulls out his phased plasma rifle and fires it into the sky. it destabilizes a pirate ship's cloak, as the pirate ship is about to engage it's FTL drive*
Penney: damn. he got away.
Laurifer: he dropped his bionical eye. i think it would be prudent to retrieve it. *penney starts taking a pill* what are you doing?
Penney: aspirin. i have to take one every time i exert myself. i hate being old.
Laurifer: how long has it been like this?
Penney: ever sinse me and my crew broke away from a slingshot effect, about 80 years ago from my perspective.
Laurifer: interesting. ah, here's his bionical eye.
Penney: hmm. it has treet's DNA all over it. this is perfect. i know someone who can find him based off of that alone.
Laurifer: who?
Penney: tony chan.
*kennedy and kadop catch up to penney*
Kennedy: now what's the plan?
Hologram: Ex-traaa! Ex-traaa! Read all about it! Hear all about it! Watch all about it! the latest attack on the white house has led to the kidnap of president kennedy! speculators blame Schrodingers' Mobius, a terrorist organisation known for repeatedly attacking various important government installations, including the pentagon, New Buckingham Palace, Taj Mohai, and most recently, the White House. Would you like to learn more?
Kennedy: well, i suppose i better get back if i have any hope of maintaining control over the country. in the meantime, i wish you best of luck.
Penney: kadop, take him in the humidifier.
Hologram: in other news, there have been several theater rooms that ended up getting inflicted with toxic gas after someone refuses to stop using his mobile communication device when the movie is starting. so far, this has only occured 8 times; one of the occurances was prevented by Captain Penney, Exalted Hero of the Xyth Galaxy and Savior of Humanity.
*the hologram shows a video of penney standing up and then saying "GET THE (beep!) DOWN FROM THERE!!!" and then throwing a tomahawk at the cat*
Penney: who is suspected of installing these gas-spewing cats?
Hologram: unknown. schrodingers' mobius has made a statement that this is one of the many things that they are protesting, and now that the government has backed off a little there are many members of schrodingers' mobius. in other news, many arms dealers and gun-shops are complaining of repeated raids, mostly for either high-caliber weaponry or hand-to-hand weaponry.
Penney: who's the suspected thief of these weapons?
Hologram: the government has explained that it is only pointing the finger singularly at schrodinger's mobius because that is the only terrorist organisation that has stated it's own name.
Penney: thank you.
Laurifer: now what??
Penney: we take the nebulizer and we attempt to investigate further. do you know where phoenix is being kept at?
Laurifer: the shipyards of Centaurus Prime.
Penney: then we shall go there.

Engineer: I'm sorry, but commander treet has not been here for at least 6 years.
Penney: no, that is not what i asked, i asked if you had any ideas as to where he was.
Engineer: he was at his quarters, and they have been dismantled.
Penney: alright. do you have any guesses as to his current location?
Laurifer: penney, may i?
*laurifer waves his hand towards a computer panel, penney nods*
Engineer: his assignment was at main enginewheeeewwww.
*laurifer rips his hand out of the wall and tosses away the holographic generator, and the engineer disappears*
Penney: lets see what else we can find.
Laurifer: he has not been here for a long time and in fact, the entire ship has been deserted for at least a week. i will see what i can salvage. *laurifer runs through a nearby wall*
Penney: laurifer, don't do that, you could break the atmospheric seal.
Laurifer: relax! i hitched up with the computer and found out which panel i can break the seal with and which one i can't. ah, here's the Q-ray. how convenient, there's the shield generator-- this is too...
Penney: laurifer, i am getting readings from this computer panel. the ship is about to self destruct in 90 seconds!
Laurifer: i told it to destroy itself. the antimatter reserves aren't enough to fry an ant, let alone destroy the ship.
Penney: no, you don't understand, the artificial supernova power plant is intact!
Laurifer: WHAT?!?! dammit, i can't shut it off from here!
Penney: whatever you just did brought it down to 30 seconds!
*suddenly, a nearby wall explodes, and laurifer is somehow carrying the Q-ray, the shield generator, the hyperdrive, and the teleporter*
Penney: you are the only person i know of who could do that.
Laurifer: greywing and kadop could do that. come on! we must return to the nebulizer!
*penney and laurifer return to the ship. laurifer sets down the four devices and returns to his station*
Laurifer: dammit, they planted a virus into phoenix's computer. it's trying to get inside. locked it out of the ship's computer, but we are still stuck here!
Penney: laurifer, blow the hatches.
Laurifer: what?! then we will be leaking atmosphere!
Penney: don't worry. *penney starts installing the shield generator* once this thing's calibrated, we won't need the hatches.
Laurifer: understood. *all hatches are blown at once*
Computer: warning. atmospheric decompression.
Penney: damn you! *penney pushes a few buttons* DAMN you! *penney kicks the shield generator*
Computer: decompression resolved.
Laurifer: how did you do that?
Penney: those vibrations tell me that we are still stuck here.
Laurifer: we were able to loosen up phoenix's grip on us, but we are still trapped.
Penney: that teleporter will take more energy than we have. fire off an antigravity pulse.
Laurifer: uh, we kinda can't
Penney: oh. right. *penney pushes a few buttons on the shield generator and suddenly, the vibrations go away*
Laurifer: we are not leaving at 40 MPH.
Penney: accelerate to top speed! hit the FTL drive!
Laurifer: how the hell could phoenix go so fast with so much interference?? there's too much interference for warp drive, and definitely for hyperdrive!
Penney: this isn't a normal reaction that's coming from phoenix's reactor. we are going to have to use all our resources. laurifer, install the Q-ray.
Laurifer: consider it done. *laurifer goes to the engineering room* done.
Penney: fire the Q-ray at phoenix and destroy it!
*phoenix explodes an a very fiery fury*
Penney: damn.
Laurifer: guess who was being kept in the Q-ray.
Penney: who?
Laurifer: your tony chan.
Penney: can we bring him back?
Laurifer: not easily, and not without harming him if we don't do it just right.
Penney: lets get back to new earth before we try anything.
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Re: The Obscure Destroyer

Postby Wv_Hawk_vW » Fri Jul 13, 2012 10:35 pm

Kennedy: so basically, you are saying that in order to find chief engineer treet, you have to thaw this kid out?
Penney: yes.
Kennedy: why do you need my permission to do that?? where dos it say?
*penney pulls out his book, turns to a page, and points; kennedy pulls out a pen and scratches it out*
Kennedy: that ink contains a special material to show which rules have been officially invalidated by me. now return to your mission. dismissed.
*penney leaves the room*
Kadop: well?
Penney: the word is, don't ask because i dont care. we can go ahead and thaw him however we want.

Laurifer: thaw sequence complete.
Kadop: these should wake him.
*kadop injects tony with a chemical that wakes him up*
Tony: What the-- WHERE AM I!!!
*laurifer and kadop give each other high fives, then they start dancing around*
Penney: you are awake. we are successful.
Tony: what?
Penney: to be honest, ive done so much time traveling that i don't even--
Kadop: in earth terms, it's 2302. this is Laurifer; I am Kadop.
Tony: your english is broken.
Penney: how is my english broken?
Kadop: I'm sorry, i interrupted the fleet-captain. please continue.
Penney: kadop, do me a favor, will you?
Kadop: yes?
Penney: shut up.
*tony and laurifer start laughing at this*
Kadop: yes sir.
Penney: what did i just say? *silence* nothing? good. now, tony, do you remember that moment when you got hit with an energy beam on the Phoenix?
Tony: YEs, and some how i was transpoerted ANOTHER 100 years into the future.
Penney: you were hit with a mental declination ray, originating from the space worm. we were able to win the battle, only thanks to a future version of myself intervening with an extremely powerful weapon known only as the Q-ray. this splattered the space worm in one shot.
Tony: in idiot's terms, please.
Penney: in other words, a very powerful ray that should have vaporized the ship instead went to your head, literally, and knocked you out. after you were knocked out, we barely held our own against the enemy space probe. to understand what happened next, one must timeskip-- almost 30 years later, from my perspective, i went back in time and destroyed the space worm using the Q-ray. in other words, you died, phoenix nearly died, and then a future me saved humanity.
Tony: So how am I alive?
Penney: uhh, well, lets just say that you are now vulnerible to any temperature exceeding 100, and at 120 you may as well be in boiling water for all the difference it makes, however you can survive without any protection at freezing, though it won't be pleasant.
Tony: So I basicly lost all powers i had before?
Penney: well, not exactly, but you were frozen.
Tony: So i cant get above 100? But what about my fire bending?
Penney: your firebending never brought you above 100, and besides, even if it does, you can easily put some aerial insulation between you and what you are bending, assuming my guess as to what it is is correct.
Tony: wait, what happened to the others?
Penney: what others?
Tony: the others that were on the ship.
penney: oh. well, some people aged up, others, like me, managed to stick around for a long time.
Tony: who is still alive?
Penney: to be honest, my memory isn't... it's not quite what it used to be. many members' statuses, including my own until very recently, remained unknown as to whether they were dead or alive. i swear, as soon as they permit me to change the rules i am taking out article 4, section 21, sub-section 6, paragraph 3, sentence 7 of the law book.
Tony: penney, surely you must know something about some of them, like krystal...
Penney: to tell you the truth, the last time i saw her was nearly 50 years ago, and she was making huge prophits selling to the ca'anians, a race that we met along the road to... where the humans are now.
Tony: *sob* oh...
Penney: you grew attached to her, and she to you. if you want, i can send laurifer and kadop to go find her, and that's probably going to be even easier than finding me considering that she was a trillionaire last time i checked, not only that, but she is unskilled in hiding from anything except door-to-door salespeople.
Tony: *blush* I-I-I did NOT!!!
Laurifer: whatever. *laurifer hands treet's bionic eye to tony* can you find him using this?
tony: let me try... *tony takes the eye in his hand and closes his eyes; a few seconds later, they blink open, and the eyes are glowing. the eyes then roll into the back of tony's head, and he collapses*
Penney: tony! kadop, get him out of it!
*kadop picks up tony and shakes him, then gives him an injection of caffeine, and this wakes up tony*
Tony: i was... *tony shudders* overwhelmed by the sensation. treet figured out that i was looking for him, and treated me as a telepath. the sensation he gave me would probably have killed most telepaths. i do, however, know that he is on a planet called Voltar Prime.
Penney: thats the prison planet! it went rogue long ago, and when we found it, we took advantage of the neverending night.
Laurifer: so thats what lafayette meant when he said Voltar Prime was going to be his own...
Kadop: he was probably going to take it over.
Tony: wouldn't surprise me if someone else is going to try the same.
Penney: i suppose it wouldn't hurt any to investigate over there.
Tony: and we would be able to see if treet's over there as well.

Penney: ahh, the wait of traveling from planet to planet.
Laurifer: i assure you, this isnt my favorite activity, either.
Kadop: i like waiting.
Laurifer: shut up, kadop.
*suddenly, the nebulizer drops out of hyperspace and it is propelled straight into a massive firefight*
Penney: what the--!? REPORT!
Kadop: uhh--
Laurifer: the rivi'i are attacking the diyonisian outpost.
Penney: the rivi'i? are you sure it's not the ramsians?
Kadop: they aren't responding to hails, and they are speaking in some language that i have never seen before.
Laurifer: those battleships are using a LOT more guns than the typical ramsian ships.
Kadop: they are using mostly plasma-based weaponry.
Penney: so, they are rivi'i, eh? looks like old grudges are back. hack into one of their battleships; ill handle this... odd looking one!
Laurifer: that looks like a new model...
*the hypernought unleashes a weapon that simply vaporizes one of the diyonisian battleships*
Penney: ...looks like they weaponized phoenix's power plant!
Kadop: we cannot win a battle against them.
Penney: son, i have been fighting hopeless battles sinse you were just a couple of digits in your father's binary code! charge the Q-ray and activate the phoenix shields.
Kadop: shields activated.
Penney: ram that terrornought and then fire the q-ray at that dreadnought.
*the nebulizer rams the terrornought; as the crystaline spires energize, the beams of light barely miss several carriers, and the terrornought explodes; the dreadnought takes the Q-ray and simply explodes, taking out a nearby ultranought*
Penney: bring us hard about, fire the Q-ray at that carrier and make sure to penetrate.
*the Q-ray slams into one of the support carriers, causing it to break apart*
Kadop: the rivi'i are giving the outpost some breathing room.
Penney: alright. bring us to where we can dock.

Quaffi: THAT is the MOST RIDICULOUS thing i have EVER heard!
Penney: it's true. they are approximately 50 parsecs away and will be here in 5 days.
Quaffi: no, not that, i mean the part about how we cannot defeat them.
Penney: are you kidding me?! they have planetary destroyers! they have starcrushers! they have--
Quaffi: what they have is nothing we can't duplicate, replicate, and counterfeit.
Penney: did you not hear what i just said?!
Quaffi: if they can destroy planets, so can we. if they can destroy star systems, so can we. as long as they are mighty, they are arrogant. while they are arrogant, they are blind, and we can steal their most precious things from them.
Penney: if we do that, the results will *not* be pretty.
Quaffi: we have also designed you puny humans something--
Laurifer: we are not puny!
Quaffi: yes you are.
Penney: compared to them, yes we are. the Diyonisians have 8 legs, their upper body size is nearly 6 times your own, the strength is even further blown out of proportion, and dont get me started on the size of their empire compared to ours.
Quaffi: you puny humans are still a force to be reckoned with. anyway, we designed you humans a completely new destroyer, based off of battle data from this race from your home universe. it's the Crusher class. it uses some basic tech stolen from the rivi'i to generate a singularity right at the center of the target ship, causing damage and destabilizing most power generators, quantum singularity being no exception, but the enemy's shields must be down in order for it to work. fortunately, most of these dreadnoughts have some pretty crappy shields.
Penney: cut the technobabble. i can understand it, but time is short.
Quaffi: actually, im done telling you about it. all i did was refit one of your breaker classes with that gravity cannon. the Crusher is ready to be used, if you want.
Penney: then we can use that.
Quaffi: i can hold this rivi'i fleet here. while they are capable of dealing some pretty serious damage, there's not much that they can do when an enlarged deflector field keeps them from getting close enough to fire anything that can actually hit.
Penney: understood.

Penney: release docking clamps.
Pilot: releasing docking clamps.
Kadop: humidifier to Crusher. we are preparing to go to planet Voltar Prime.
Penney: understoof. good hunting out there.
Laurifer: nebulizer to crusher. i dont think you can get to voltar prime without a little assistance.
Penney: nebulizer, go. theres an entire space station keeping the enemies from attacking us.
*an explosion rocks the ship*
Penney: correction. we are going to need all the help we can get. activate main engines and take us through the enemy fleet.
Tactical: sir, our shields will never hold against them!
Penney: i am aware of that. the outpost will defend us.
*the rocket launchers and artillery turrets all focus fire on the portion that penney is taking his ship into*
Penney: see? what did i tell you, they did--
Tactical: that explosion took out our shields... damn, im having trouble reassembling them.
Penney: engineering, i need shields!
Engineer: we aint got none, captain, we don't! the generators will take almost an hour to regenerate!
Penney: why did you let that happen?! helm, evasives!
Engineer: i-i-its out of my power!
Penney: i dont give a damn. fire the singularity cannon!
*a single black hole appears and the power plant in 6 nearby dreadnoughts causes them to implode, however the hypernought continues going after the Crusher, firing its main cannon the whole way*
Penney: bring us about and ready primary weapon systems.
*the station fires a massive high-energy phaser that cuts straight through the hypernought's shields and vaporizes it, unleashing an artificial supernova*
Penney: take us into hyperspace.
Pilot: this ship is not installed with--
Penney: activate this ship's primary FTL drive and get us to Voltar Prime!!

Penney: this is not what i thought it would be like.
Kadop: indeed. i personally expected this place to be a little more...
Laurifer: pristine?
Penney: we need to look for Gaius. he is a well muscled man who likes to smoke a cigar, and last time he was here, he was the king of the prisoners.
Kadop: also the top drug dealer.
Laurifer: and from what i heard, he's a warrior king.
Penney: hes so well muscled that one could see his muscles even though they are within the prisoner uniform, unlike most of the other prisoners here.
Laurifer: is that him over there? *laurifer points to a man with a joint of marijuana hanging out of his mouth; he is black, somewhat bald, and his suit is nearly skin-tight, as if its too small for him*
Penney: that's him. *penney wades through the crowd*
Gaius: you must be captain penney.
Penney: I'm flattered.
Gaius: Don't be. my primary opponent in the sale of drugs was the rivi'i. how could i not hear about the man who kept them from doing business with my clients?
Penney: well, gaius, I'm here for a certain investigation i am performing.
Gaius: stuff it, penney. all you are going to get from me is that, in 2 days, this entire motherfucking planet will belong to me. the day after that, i will have a war fleet of my own, and all the neighboring empires will become addicted to my drugs.
Penney: nice try. actually, where are you getting your fleet from?
Gaius: why should i tell you?
Penney: stuff it, gaius, and cut the shit while your at it. the humans are pulling every ship out of mothballs to combat the Rompvershling threat. now, *penney grabs gaius and pins him to the wall* WHERE ARE YOU GETTING THOSE SHIPS FROM!?
Gaius: simple, really. all i have to do is capture a single arms freighter, and i have enough weapons to arm a small armada. capture any other ship, whether cargoships, paradise-class cruiseliners, or even pirate nagatos, and i can use the arms freighter.
*an explosion gets penney's attention; in penney's distraction, gaius manages to get away*
Cops: FREEZE! PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR!
Kadop: looks like we are surrounded.
Laurifer: there are 113 members of the riot police out there.
Penney: kadop, can you take a bullet?
Kadop: i can take just about anything, but they have weapons that can stop me-- without destroying me.
Laurifer: not me. they cant stop me without destroying me. *laurifer pulls out his phased plasma rifle*
Penney: laurifer, what are you doing?
Laurifer: i am getting us out of this situation.
*laurifer marches outside the door and points his rifle at the cops*
Sergeant: FREEZE! throw down your weapon, hands up!
Laurifer: ya sure?
Sergeant: we have EM weaponry!
*laurifer throws down the rifle, then crosses his arms in front of his chest*
Sergeant: cuff him, but be careful, hes a 'mancer!
*two cops start closing in on laurifer; after taking 5 or 10 steps, they get within arm's reach of laurifer. laurifer grabs one of the cops by the arm and uses it to deck the other, then throws him at the car that holds the volley; laurifer charges into the police mob, and dust flies off as they shoot at him. it takes almost 40 cops just to bring him down, leaving a very wide gap in the police mob*
Penney: well, that worked! lets go.
Kadop: but what about laurifer?
Penney: he seems to be handling himself. come on.
*laurifer trips a couple of cops and escapes the grip of the other 38, then starts running; all 113 cops are chasing after laurifer, and failing to keep up with him*
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Re: The Obscure Destroyer

Postby Ginger88895 » Sat Jul 14, 2012 5:14 am

Penney: wow. impressive. just impressive.
Kadop: ... *Silent*
Sergeant: ... *Silent*

-z0mg VOID ENGINE!
-no, it's cheat engine.
-0mg pwned xD
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Assistance requested

Postby Wv_Hawk_vW » Tue Jul 17, 2012 8:25 pm

anyone else wanna write in the obscure destroyer?
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Re: The Obscure Destroyer

Postby Wv_Hawk_vW » Sat Jul 21, 2012 11:54 pm

Penney: great. just great.
Kadop: now there's no way off this planet!
Laurifer: Voltar prime is surrounded by a repulsor shield. no ship can land on voltar prime.
Kadop: and the elevator was blown up by the terrorists.
Penney: laurifer, can a teleporter work through the shield?
Laurifer: yes, but where are you going to get a teleporter?
Penney: the nebulizer was equipped with the phoenix's teleporting device, was it not?
Laurifer: yes, but there's no way to get in contact with the nebulizer, not without me on there.
Penney: we can contact the Crusher instead.
Laurifer: but the nebulizer will attempt to escape in every way possible, if we send the crusher!
Penney: Let me worry about that.
Kadop: two terrorists coming from over there.
Penney: they don't look like terrorists--
Henrietta: captain penney.
Jennifer: did you finally turn to piracy?
Penney: actually, no. i was investigating what the hell was going on around this planet.
Henrietta: you are stuck here, are you not?
Penney: well, yes.
Henrietta: as are we. however, we have a radio transmitter, you do not. we can transmit to your ship and get you off this planet... for a price.
Jennifer: we could use your..... body.
Penney: WHAT?! *penney points at himself* does this old man look like he's willing to be--
Jennifer: I'm talking for asexual purposes.
Penney: really?
Henrietta: join the Schrodinger's Mobius.
Penney: hell no.
Henrietta: then you are not--
Jennifer: wait. he can find some other way off the planet without us, it will just take him more time.
Laurifer: that's right. my--
Jennifer: join us, and we shall have a way to increase the firepower of the human war fleet. in fact, we could prevent the Rompvershlings from becoming a threat if we do this.
Penney: how do you propose to do that?
Henrietta: that's for us to know and you to find out. now, do we have an agreement?
Penney: uh, sure.

Penney: this is NOT WHAT I HAD IN MIND!!!!!
Jennifer: things are very rarely what one has in mind! charge!!
Henrietta: here comes an inspection ship. prepare yourself.
Cop: Shiminjo ni hikinukimasu.
Henrietta: I think he just said "your universal translator was bought at discount price at rileymart and i will shoot you if you don't floor it"
Penney: for once, i agree.
Cop: Shiminga, watashi wa ue no purudaun itta! Osoku natsu tari, watashi wahi o hiraku koto o yoginaku sa remasu!
Jennifer: now he's furious!
Penney: do we have weapons?!
Henrietta: this ship is supposed to infiltrate the rompvershlings, rompvershling freighters don't have--
Penney: DO WE HAVE WEAPONS!?!?
Henrietta: yes!
Penney: bring the weapons online! target that--
*the ship shakes; an energy ray from behind, obviously originating from the cop, zooms in front*
Penney: that was just a warning shot! if we don't stop him, he will shoot us down! I SAID POWER THE WEAPONS!
Henrietta: I'm working on it! im working on it!
Jennifer: weapons are powered up.
Penney: bring us to the sweet spot angle, take aim at their engines, and fire!
*the ship rolls backwards, flying in full reverse while pointing it's weapons at the law enforcement ship*
Henrietta: are you sure we have to f--
Penney: fire! FIRE!! DAMN YOU!!! *penney leaps over to henrietta's console, lifts her up, and throws her across the room; he then pushes a few buttons, and several shots come out of the freighter; the law enforcement ship drops out of FTL*
Henrietta: what did you do that for??
Penney: he was targeting our power plant!
Jennifer: if he had fired, we would have been destroyed!
Penney: negotiation was NOT an option, considering our translator doesn't seem to be working.
Henrietta: but-- but-- you--
Penney: i targeted their main engines. that should leave them unharmed, but also stranded. if they have a half-decent engineer, they can repair the engines and get back to work.
Jennifer: Henrietta, dearest, he's right. there's no need to panic.
Henrietta: your right. lets just return to what we were doing.
*penney gives jennifer and henrietta a funny look*
Kadop: Penney, i believe jennifer and henrietta may be lesbians and are sexually attracted to each other.
*everyone gives kadop an "are you kidding me?" look*
Kadop: Ok... I'm going to just... go over here and... monitor something...
*kadop goes to a sidepanel and starts staring intently at it, occasionally pushing a button or two*
Laurifer: now that that's settled, there's a convoy bearing--
Penney: i don't care. avoid it.
Laurifer: aye sir.
Jennifer: now, dearest...
Henrietta: yes, yes, I'm coming.
*jennifer and henrietta leave the bridge*
Penney: Whoo! I thought they were going to do it on the bridge!
Laurifer: I'm glad they didn't.
Penney: you took the words right out of my-- gah!! *penney clutches his chest*
Kadop: penney, you need to avoid over-exerting yourself!
Penney: *penney takes an aspirin* I'll be fine.
Kadop: you should get some rest.
Penney: and you should learn when a person needs rest and when all he needs is a quick treatment.
Laurifer: he's right, you know. *laurifer pulls out a heart stabilizer and waves it over penney's chest*
Penney: thank you, laurifer.
Kadop: captain, there's a massive rompvershling ship coming this way.
Penney: avoid it!
Kadop: the engines aren't responding!
Laurifer: I'm on it! *laurifer climbs underneath his station and starts working on getting the engines working*
Penney: how big is it??
Kadop: putting it on viewer!
*a rather massive ship appears on viewer; it almost looks like a ta'yawhan superbattleship, except its wing talons look more like shark fins, and there is a cylinder where the star would be. the nose is significantly longer, and the engines on the back are much more pronounced.*
Kadop: we should leave as soon as possible.
Laurifer: that ship has a massive tractor beam on us. if we are going to escape, we need FTL power now.
Penney: kadop!
Kadop: the controlls are still not--
Laurifer: I'm going to try to do it manually!
*the entire ship starts shaking*
Penney: what's going on down there?
Laurifer: damn! the engines are so powerful that they are ripping the ship apart due to the graviton beam!
Penney: scan the ship for the source of the tractor beam!
Kadop: located. firing the Q-ray at it.
Penney: no, that will take too much power. fire a cruiser missile at it.
*the missile flies near the emitter, but gets crushed*
Laurifer: may i suggest firing lance lasers?
Penney: fire proton cannons at the graviton emitter!
*the protons fly straight into the tractor beam, essentially ripping it off the ship*
Penney: now, get us out of here!
*the nebulizer starts to turn around, but gets caught in yet another tractor beam*
Laurifer: that one is merely holding onto us. it's not pulling us in, it's not pushing us away, it's merely got a hold on us.
Kadop: we are being hailed.
*jennifer and henrietta walk into the scene; henrietta is buttoning her blouse while jennifer is putting on her belt*
Penney: on viewer.
Cube: Greetings, captain penney.
Penney: it appears that my reputation not only preceeds me in known species, but also exceeds me in unknown races.
Cube: I am cube. We, the rompvershlings, require your assistance.
Penney: what kind of assistance?
Cube: normally, our empire is much, much, much more powerful than anything else. however, there is one species from your universe that is giving us a lot of trouble...
Penney: *my* universe? what are you talking about?
Cube: don't act stupid, penney, we may currently be enemies of the ta'yawhans, but their ships are easily captured and hacked. we know everything about you.
Penney: then you must know that, given a strong weapon and a strong shield, i can achieve anything.
Cube: whether that is true or not doesn't matter. only one enemy has ever been a true threat to the rompvershlings, and they are forcing us to migrate.
Penney: so you guys aren't trying to conquer us...
Cube: no. if we could settle for more peaceful measures, we would; however, so far, we can't even open up trade negotiations with other nations.
Penney: then maybe i can be of some assistance.
Discord: WvHawkvW#6491.

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Ginger88895
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Re: The Obscure Destroyer

Postby Ginger88895 » Mon Aug 27, 2012 9:51 am

That's a hard work.

-z0mg VOID ENGINE!
-no, it's cheat engine.
-0mg pwned xD

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